We are sorry we haven't written for a while - this is because we have been sitting in our flat in darkness, closed off from the world (wide web) waiting for an engineer to fix us some internet. Contact and communication has been scarce with just a mobile phone or two (and the landline) to assist us with. But with budgetary constraints we have had to monitor our outgoings and so the texts have been few and far between. We have closed ourselves off, shut out the universe and kept company with just each other (and our new HD ready TV and lots of borrowed dvds). Did we survive the beginning of marital humdum? The answer is a big fat yes. The reason of course is because our two souls were imprisoned to harmonious partnership with each other even before they hit the earth. They were both tried and sentenced and naturally, they were equipped with the right tools for the creation of bliss. And here we sit now in our nice 2 bed with a balcony (well sort of) and the sun shining through on our evenings. And so to tell our tales of beautiful bonding and union, we shall in our own verse, speak to you about life. With each other. In rainy England. This is how it began.
The airport
I rushed over to the airport straight from work, getting there the same time Toni landed and stood in arrivals like an eager-maniac-high-on-adrenalin for 45 minutes before the anticipation was over. My honey was dressed very smart for the occasion and looked considerably well for a guy who had just travelled 9 hours in an oxygen-starved jet. (I'll let Toni tell you about the service). We hugged and kissed and grinned like kids on a first date, all shy and excited and nervous too. I wanted to just grab him and more but it was a public place and I would have got us arrested - not the start I was planning. Then quite casually, Toni popped a ring out of his rucksack and plonked it on my finger. My engagement ring. Which incidentally I had re-set in platinum to match the band. I wanted to cry with happiness. But I grabbed his bag instead - the one with all the cash in it (no way intentionally, just lucky) and headed to Dad's car for collection.
Well my day started with a shower at Jp’s house and getting dressed for England, oh! And for my wife too ;). Then it was long drive through the morning delhi traffic, but with Jp on the wheel it wasn’t a problem. But the traffic was not the problem; I had the weight of my bag on my mind which had being bugging me since I left home. With a meagre 20 kilos I was supposed to start a new life in a new country, how would I fit all that curry powder in my bag. It seemed to me that I’d filled the bag over 20 kilos.
Anyway Jp and I managed to check the weight before we got into the airport. With it started the game of 20 million questions. It started from the time I showed the ticket to the guard at the entry gate at the airport ( for those who are not familiar with New Delhi Airport, no one is allowed to enter the airport but the passengers) so first the guard at the gate says, “is your flight today?” “when?” Then the guy who weighs the luggage says to me, “is this your first flight?” “What’s in your bag?” Then before the ticket counter, “why are you going?” “Where is your wife?” “When were you married?” Ticket counter girl says “what is the purpose of your visit?” Then its the immigration people, customs people, security people, and boarding people. It’s not that they ask you a couple of questions, they repeat questions and add their own. So if the first person asked 5 question, the next will ask those 5 first and then add another 5 to it. I think at the end of this barrage of questions you ask yourself: is that really my name? Am I really the person on the passport? One might question: is that my photo in the passport?
At last I boarded the plane and took off with any delay and we were told we would arrive in London before time. With the opening of the disinfectant sprays (non toxic chemicals for all my white friends. We from the 3rd world (or as PC people would have it “emerging economies” are use to have all planes exiting their lands for the “cleaner” West detoxed) we were made ready to enter the super power lands.
My fellow passenger seated next to me wanted to make sure all the germs had died so he ordered a beer which was promptly provided to him from a lady in red (now it’s time for “guess the airline” game). I think this airline was loaded (you know with what) because when I asked for a glass of water this lady in red came and told me to get water from the back of the plane myself, she was like “how dare you ask for water when you could get beer and wine”. By this time my buddy to the right was on his 3rd beer so I had to ask him to get up to let me through so I could walk down to the water fountain and drink some water and then plead with him again to let me pass and take my seat. I guess the crew were not interested in serving non-alcoholic drinks because almost the same thing happened when I asked for a cola. It took three different people 50 minutes to get me 100ml of a small cola, whereas the distinguished AA member sitting next to me got his sixer in less then 60 seconds, even Nicolas Cage couldn’t beat that. Guess the answer I was the looking for was alcohol and so a glass of RED was ordered and taken in one gulp. The iceing on the cake did not come until we were about to land and the crew was asking for a glowing report in their crew evaluation forms, and my friends, this is the climax of the flight, my flight into London: the guy sitting next to me who had had 6 or 7 beers by now gets to fill in 3 crew evaluation forms. You can all guess now who didn’t get any forms to fill. Yes you guessed it right: ME. So we proceed to the next round: landing at London was smooth and well before time like the pilot said, but the rest, everything else, was the same as if I never left India. We circled over Delhi for 9 hours and landed back in India. I say this because everything was just like an Indian-style queue at Heathrow. Loads of Indians working wherever you go at the airport but it was England. Immigration done. Medical done. Luggage pick up done, Now time to get out of the airport to see my baby. With my baby waiting with a smile on her face and ready for a hug, (and that’s what she got) I gave her the big ring she had been waiting for.
Family
I had already prepared Toni for the Saturday following his arrival. Once my masis had got wind of Toni's arrival the phone was constantly engaged. All and sundry were desperate to meet him (I wouldn't be surprised if he'd attracted more attention than Shilpa when she arrived in town, he's certainly better looking) and to appease the wave of interest, dear Mum organised an afternoon for about 40 relatives to meet him. Yes, 40 (actually 50 if you include those aborad) is the number of people who fit into "most immediate family" category, being made up of mum's brother (Mamaji) and sisters (Masis) and their husbands (Masarjis), dad's brothers (Chachajis) and their wives (Chachis) and all their children and husbands and grandchildren. They came in groups so that the house wasn't brimming with over-eager Indians although it was a full house at most times. I was a little worried that Toni might feel awkward or shy or nervous about the day. There was no need. My hubby was in his element. Sitting with the men-folk he had the floor on world politics, economy, religion and whatever else they talked about. My star. I felt so happy for him and proud to be with such a wonderful man.
Back to work
After 9 days of married life, eating lots of yummy junk (chocolate/ice cream//pizza to name just a few), watching lots of 24, slouching on the sofa, and other marital activities of a nondescript nature it was time for me to head back into work. Half looking forward to using my brain a little and half worried about the workload awaiting me, I slugged into the office and yawned all week. It was difficult. Getting back into a work routine after seriously contending for couch potato of the year was not an easy task. But the pain was eased by Toni who appointed himself house chef and concierge of our abode. It was a fully comprehensive service that he provided, with dinner ready every evening and a sparklingly clean house day in day out. And with the cutest smile too.
